STAGED PROTEST FOR MORE FREE TIME FAILS WHEN NO ONE SHOWS UP.
Chicago, IL - Slothmore Institute, a national organization supplying responsibility shirkers with excuses to stay home and the tools to negate the need to ever leave the couch, announced last month that its members would execute a large scale work no-show and sit-in.
The protest was scheduled to occur last week around the very immobile Picasso sculpture in downtown Chicago. The movement, or lack thereof, wanted to forward the cause of not having to work, to demand more home delivery of food, and argue that Chicagos garbage collectors be required to remove the trash from the garbage cans under members sinks. The organization can claim a 50% success rate, as members across the greater metro, failed to show up for work that monday, but also failed to show up for the protest.