"It's no secret we don't know what we're doing. Will you forgive us? Please? Please come back. Please? We don't want to sound desperate but we're sorry. Have we said we're sorry enough? I mean we spent a butt load of money on the Apple guy and he totally screwed up by essentially getting rid of sales, and forgoing our target in favor of the young folks and you totally hated that. So we fired him.
Although ironically he approved this spot before he left. Where were we. Oh yeah. Sorry. So So Sorry. Will you come back now please? We'll do anything for you."

Client: JCPenny

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kidsleepy 17 year copywriter, now CD, who has worked in many cities including Pittsburgh, New York, Atlanta, Montreal and currently Los Angeles. I snark because I care. I ain't complainin' I'm just tellin' it like it is.