(credits withheld)

Not sure what to make of this ad. Does the LG Secret phone allow the user to perform voodoo? Is it the preferred phone of stalkers worldwide? Does the secret actually come with some super-fly ultra-zooming powers that allow for filming the neighbouring girl as she sleeps, and remote control that rips the sheets off her and starts the water sprinklers? All the while playing cheesy porn-esque musak? Really? Because I'd like to set off some cold water sprinklers in the office of the fucks who wrote this shite, and then make them dance to that horrid soundtrack, naked. Dance!