Dear stupid banner ad. How I love thee. Let me count the ways.

You blink like it was Netscape 1999. Looking at you makes me think of Jakob Nielsen screaming "it is simply evil" in despair.

You promise me a way of generating free electricity forever. In a software box. Software. So whatever I'll be doing in order to break the laws of thermodynamics, I'll be doing it on with a computer running on electricity. Good to know. You're selling a perpetual motion machine - oh sorry a "zero point magnetic power generator" - in a software box. This makes me laugh so hard I've ruined my makeup today.

You link to the most useless and complicated diagram of all time, and that alone makes me laugh out loud. It's "the grid" see? So thank you dear Magniwork, for all the laughs. Good luck in rounding up the suckers with that banner ad.

* Yes, the headline is from the Simpsons.

Marge: I'm worried about the kids, Homey. Lisa's becoming very obsessive. This morning I caught her trying to dissect her own raincoat.
Homer: [scoffs] I know. And this perpetual motion machine she made today is a joke! It just keeps going faster and faster.
Marge: And Bart isn't doing very well either. He needs boundaries and structure. There's something about flying a kite at night that's so unwholesome. [looks out window]
Bart: [creepy voice] Hello, Mother dear.
Marge: [closing the curtains] That's it: we have to get them back to school.
Homer: I'm with you, Marge. Lisa! Get in here.
[Lisa walks in, chuckling nervously]
In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!