Decrypting perfume advertisements - friday fun!

This post Making sense of mens fragrance ads posed a severe threat to my keybord as I was slurping coffee. Example:

Davidoff
Clearly the good life consists of being able to spend lazy afternoons on a gigantic tree branch admiring the results of consuming web-purchased enlargement pills over a sustained period of time.

And it struck me that we could be doing this for hours - trying to make sense of fragrance ads like the full frontal nude YSL ad for smegma7, sorry that's "M7". Shall we? (Remember you can post images in comments folks!)

(click on images for larger versions)

"Oh snuggles, do you wuv me more than anytink in the whole wide world? Will you love me for evah and evah and evah? Coz I wuv you so moishe! My Cocktête, my pookie, my poopsie-butt, my darling mopsy-head. Will you still wuve me when I'm sixty-fouh? Promesse?"

It's like a pink Pepe le pew. Yeah gimme some of that. Not.

Yes, we know - perfume shall make us attractive and lead to sex - but having a woman rubbing herself with a dildo-like bottle in the ad is just a tad un-subtle, don't you think? I mean look at that bottle. It even has the jap eye. Realism rules.

Oh, and wasn't it Echo who withered away fading from grief as her true love the ultimate himbo Narcissus stared at his own reflection in a lake? Echo once talked so much rubbish that Juno forfeited her ability to speak except reply. This is something the modern woman wants to emulate? Ho-kay. What a terrible name.