/** */ Do you work in advertising - or are you a prostitute? | Adland

Do you work in advertising - or are you a prostitute?

Does this sound familiar? Twentythree pointers to clue you in to if you are a prostitute or simply an advertising creative. The similartities are endless.... (oh, and do please add yours!)

  • 1. You work very odd hours.
  • 2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client happy.
  • 3. You are paid well but your pimp gets most of the money.
  • 4. You charge by the hour but your time can be extended for the right price.
  • 5. You are not proud of what you do.
  • 6. Creating fantasies for your clients is rewarded.
  • 7. It's difficult to have a family.
  • 8. You have no job satisfaction.
  • 9. If a client beats you up, the pimp just sends you to another client.
  • 10. You are embarrassed to tell people what you do for a living.
  • 11. People ask you, "What do you do?" and you can't explain it.
  • 12. Your family hardly recognizes you at reunions (at least the reunions you attend.)
  • 13. Your friends have distanced themselves from you and you're left hanging with only other "professionals."
  • 14. Your client always wants to know how much you charge and what they get for the money.
  • 15. Your pimp drives nice cars like Mercedes or BMWs.
  • 16. Your pimp encourages drinking and you become addicted to drugs to ease the pain of it all.
  • 17. You know the pimp is charging more than you are worth but if the client is foolish enough to pay it's not your problem.
  • 18. When you leave to go see a client, you look great, but return looking like hell (compare your appearance on Monday AM to Friday PM).
  • 19. You are rated on your "performance" in an excruciating ordeal.
  • 20. Even though you get paid the big bucks, it's the client who walks away smiling.
  • 21. The client always thinks your "cut" of your billing rate is higher than it actually is, and in turn, expects miracles from you.
  • 22. When you deduct your "take" from your billing rate, you constantly wonder if you could get a better deal with another pimp.
  • 23. Everyday you wake up and tell yourself, "I'm not going to be doing this stuff the rest of my life.

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anonymous's picture

You cringe every time you have contact, but pretend that you like it and try to fly away to your "happy place" until it's over.

anonymous's picture

28. Half the time, you open your mouth but end up taking up the ass anyway.


anonymous's picture

Sydney is full of prostitutes!

kamari's picture

This is the best joke in the joke-topic, hands down!

Dabitch's picture

Similar list, Differences between consulting and prostitution at thatwasfunny.com :)

TruthInAdvertising's picture

29. You can't take criticism without taking it extremely personally.

I know, that isn't funny.

Dabitch's picture

Were you thinking of someone in particular? ;)

TruthInAdvertising's picture

I've seen so many young whiz kids do it. They might be talented but if they can't take criticism well, they're just asses.

Dabitch's picture

30. The client wants you to meet them at a hotel, rather than at their place.