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Wonderbra wants your breasts, melons, knockers, puppies and jugs.

Jumping on not one, but two, old bandwagons Wonderbra is launching a campaign to find Britain's best breasts. If you have a D to G cup you can flaunt your stuff on the wonderbra site and win the possibility of becoming their model. There's an open-call audition later this month where UK women can take part in a massive photo shoot. Each participant will be individually photographed, and the photos will be put together to one masive mosaic-style billboard ad (yep, that's the second old bandwagon). To advertise the competition they've dusted off the tired old "knockers, jugs, headlights, melons" idea in a small "viral" that they will seed on social networking sites. We'll see if the mosaic a.k.a the "biggest collection of cleavages" will be a "celebration of Britain's busts" or just yet a tired old idea rehashed.

Anonymous Adgrunt's picture
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purplesimon's picture

If they did it with 'moobs' it might seem fairly innovative. As it stands, this is old hat, rehashed and reasonably obvious. What will they do if they don't get enough models turn up?

What mosaic image will they create from the pictures taken on the day?

So many ways this could go wrong despite having already, in my mind, gone wrong. :)

Dabitch's picture

hahaha, it's gone all bad in my head as well. Moobs would be fantastic!

alex's picture

Yes, but D to G moobs? Blimey.

Someone in my office has just explained the sausages to me. Never heard that expression before (he said, cunningly avoiding explaining it to anyone else, just to see like...)

Dabitch's picture

Oh great. Now you're going to have to explain it to me!

alex's picture

Might. Might not...

Dabitch's picture

Bangers? As in Bangers and mash?

alex's picture

Yes. But why?

Dabitch's picture

....uhm.. I dunno. Does it have anything to do with silicone breasts and the supposed popping noise they might make when they cook? ;))
I've only ever seen people say "bangers" in the Sun about Jordan silicone collection so I kinda assumed it didn't apply to the real deal.

alex's picture

Apparently, it's one of Gok Wan's terms for the breasts. That, and *gulp* 'breasticles'. Oh dear.

malkie66's picture

Let me guess...that's a photo of two tits right? Either Blue Tits or Great Tits. Sigh.

malkie66's picture

DaBitch...this is totally off topic but I thought you might like to know the URL www.sexe.org just sold for $151,400 - one of the largest .org sales ever. And "sexe" of course means "sex" here in Paris. (This message will self-destruct in 3:01 minutes.)

RLDavies's picture

For those not up on British slang, I make it:
1. Coconuts
2. Pillows
3. Puppies
4. Knockers
5. Fried eggs
6. Jugs
7. Tits
8. Bangers
9. Honkers
10. Baps
11. Cupcakes
12. Melons

They ought to have been great tits for extra pun appeal, but these are blue tits. At least they're not bearded tits.
And I wasn't up on "bangers", either, but it's pretty obvious in context.

"My bumps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps" -- Dawn French, The Vicar of Dibley

alex's picture

Hooters, surely?

Anyway, it's all too easy. How would they have visualised 'norks' or 'bristols'?

RLDavies's picture

Hooters or honkers, yes. I think hooters might be a somewhat more American term. Never even thought of hooters. It's nearly one in the afternoon and I'm not properly awake yet.

I suppose Bristols could be done with a picture of the city, doubled, but who would recognise it? Norks, I have no idea!

Urban Dictionary under "hooters" has a long list of terms, most of which would be hard to visualise. Clavicle clumps? Weasels of the chest? Effeminate masses? Well, that last might be picturable...