Hanes Gets Comfy

Hanes does it again, claiming to achieve maximum comfort with yet another product. Underwear. Well, underwear has been known to create the occasional hassle. Maybe it's itchy. Maybe there's a loose thread. Maybe you're not wearing any. Well, the new Hanes underwear for men can't exactly fix these problems, but it does claim to offer the ultimate comfort for when you wanna be...lazy.

Recently, Hanes released two commercials featuring their new idea. The first takes us on a short visit into "Hanes Comfort Labs". Only the best 'comfortologists' work here, thinking of ways to better fit our comfort needs. Only recently, as you'll probably remember, they discovered "The revolutionary Tagless T". You know, that T-shirt with no tag. This commercial features the team studying 'midriff irritation' and 'waistband indentation'. They like to call it M.I.W.I (Pronounced Mee-wee). But thanks to the new Comfortsoft Waistband, this will no longer be a problem! As we see how happy one of the lab's test monkeys is in the new underwear, the camera cuts to, surprise, Michael Jordan (You know...famous basketball player who has nothing better to do then wiggle his feet into a pair of Hanes socks). Michael is observing some of the recent underwear work through a magnifying glass when one of the Lab employees shows him their finished product. It's a pair of underwear with a Comfortsoft Waistband covered in cotton, plus it's tagless. Then Michael does what he's famous for in those Hanes commercials. He delivers one dull line: "Wow, this could be our most comfortable underwear ever." He gives the employee a pat on the back.

At the same time another commercial was released. Now what better way to advertise comfy underwear, then to show a bunch of lazy bum men wearing the stuff? The beginning shows a guy in bed, tossing and turning in search for comfort. The announcer says, "Hanes created the Comfort soft Waistband because we know guys. To get comfortable, they will employ any available resource." After the guy tosses and turns, eventually taking the covers for himself, we cut to another guy. This one's lyin' on the couch. Bare feet, bare legs, unshaven face. He can't quite reach the remote from where he is, so he does exactly as the announcer said. He reaches forward and tilts the table. The remote slides into his hand. After a shot of his underwear, we see him smile in a satisfied sort of way. Then it's another scene change. Now we see a father and son, lying on the floor. No pants, of course. Got to have a clear view of those undies. "Guys will pass on those comfort-seeking skills to future generations" says the announcer. The two guys look up at the TV as the previously mentioned commercial appears on their screen. Michael says his line again as the commercial ends.

So, will that blatant targeting of lazy bum men grab a few guy's attention? Will sales Blast or bomb? We'll see. If it works, I'm sure we can look forward to more comfy clothes. Rest assured, Michael will always be there, saying his one line.